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1. Read the draft.2. Leave in-text comments on the draft. I expect 2 comments on every major part/idea/point. Please comment on the MLA formatting and Works Cited page. Pleas also leave comments on areas of the paper where you see logical fallacies or weakness in the argument. Please also include a few comments on grammar and/or sentence structure.3. Once you complete the in line comments, please fill out this rubric. You need to leave detailed comments in the Comment area by assigning a grade to each criteria and explain why and how to improve next to each grade area. Then, write a detailed summary of what was done well and what can be improved for the final revision in the “Overall Comments” area


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Interpretation Essay Grading Rubric
Essay Component
Central Idea—The essay has a strong point/thesis
statement, which is clearly started early in the paper. The
paper has a clear preview of the points that will be used to
support the main claim. The main claim responds to the
chosen San Diego issue.
Support—The argument is sufficiently supported with
relevant citations from outside resources. Citations are
introduced and documented per MLA format. The
relevance of the support to the topic sentence and thesis
statement is explained. There are at least three outside
academic sources used throughout the essay. At least two of
those sources are academic peer reviewed articles and/or
Structure— The essay has a clear introduction, body
paragraphs with topic sentences that support the thesis
statement, and an effective conclusion, which reiterates the
main claim. Paragraphs follow academic structure.
Organization—Ideas are logically organized and follow a
clear pattern of development. Transitional statements are
used to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. The
paragraphs follow strong academic structure.
Mechanics—Correct MLA format and citations
used. Works Cited is complete an in MLA format. Limited
grammatical and proofreading errors throughout the
essay. The third person point of view is used throughout the
essay. The essay is at least 4 pages in length.
Overall Comments:
Homeless Population in San Diego
In 2018, Point in Time Study completed on January 26, the official count of the homeless
population was 8,576 (Warth). San Diego is the fourth-largest homeless population in the
country, and we are currently facing a problem with illegal immigrants coming into the country
by crossing the border in San Diego, as well as along the United States/Mexico border. If
President Trump were to take the money he plans on using for the border wall, he could make
housing for the homeless and lower the homelessness population in San Diego and then the
nation as a whole.
San Diego was the fourth largest homeless population in the United States in 2018 and
currently, President Trump plans on building an incredibly expensive border wall to keep out
illegal immigrants. Instead of building an $8 million wall, President Trump could build homeless
housing that help get homeless out of homelessness permanently. If there were to be permanent
housing, it could in turn save the United States more money rather than having to pay for
emergency services for the homeless like emergency room visits. In an article that helped break
down the costs that San Diego County pays to combat homelessness, it states, “Housing
initiatives account for $535 million, or almost 85 percent, of the total spending. Rental assistance
for homeless and at-risk populations make up about 90 percent of housing funds, with the rest
going to programs that include transitional housing, emergency shelters and permanent
supportive housing” (Halverstadt). If we were to take that money spent housing initiatives and
spend it on permanent housing which would cost about $10 million each, we could build roughly
54 homeless shelters across San Diego County (Department of General Services). With making
homeless shelters that include on-site medical services and job training, it will prepare the
homeless for working regularly which could help the United States build more jobs. San Diego is
already in the process of building permanent housing for the homeless. According to the San
Diego Housing Commission website, San Diego has directed $79.7 million in federal, City of
San Diego and SDHC resources over the span of 3 fiscal years, from 2018 to 2020 (SDHC). That
money will be going to making permanent housing for individuals and families. There has been
3,051 housing opportunities created through a program called HOUSING FIRST. With
opportunities created by HOUSING FIRST, it will help people and families who are homeless or
are on the brink of homelessness and will steadily start to decrease the homelessness rate in San
Initially, permanent housing could help the homeless population recover from living on the
streets and then, get a job to support themselves. “The supportive housing model combines
affordable housing assistance with vital support services for individuals living with mental
illness, HIV/AIDS or other serious health problems. Moreover, numerous research studies have
shown that permanent supportive housing costs less than other forms of emergency and
institutional care” (Coalition for the Homeless). Restating the idea that if the City of San Diego
were to build permanent housing, it could save the United States money because the permanent
housing facilities would have on-site medical services which could help with those infected with
HIV/AIDS or another contractible disease. On-site medical care services are important because
disease among the homeless is another problem within itself.
In 2017, there was a Hepatitis A outbreak and health officials have found out it had begun
with the homeless in San Diego. “The spread of the disease has been concentrated among the
homeless and illicit drug users, who are also often exposed to unsanitary conditions. But about a
third of those infected and two who died were neither homeless nor drug users. (Experts don’t
know exactly how the disease spread to the general population, but it is easily transferable by
even the slightest contact with infected feces.)” (The Globe and Mail). Health officials are
confused by how Hepatitis A reached the general population who were never drug users or
homeless. The homeless don’t have regular easy access to showers or bathrooms so they will
relieve themselves in public, on sidewalks or in shrubbery. “Fecal matter will inevitably be
released into the air, and it will cling to surfaces, including floors and walls.” (Enviro-Master).
The homeless have experienced public restroom shutdowns due to congregations of the homeless
population, so unfortunately, they have to go to the restroom in public which would include fecal
matter in public areas. “Dr. Schooley worries the public attention on the housing crisis may
prove to be short lived, setting cities like San Diego up for another outbreak. ‘Ignoring
vulnerable populations like this does make communities at risk for much bigger costs down the
road that people don’t think about, don’t talk about and don’t want to address,’ he said” (The
Globe and Mail). If we do not do something about the issue of the homeless in San Diego, it
opens up doors to many opportunities of another, even more deadly outbreak.
In Christian Hill’s article, “Public shelter alone won’t fix homelessness crisis, consultant
says”, he states that addressing the homelessness issue by building homeless shelters will not
help resolve the issue. “Lane County has a significant homelessness problem that a public shelter
alone won’t fix, a consultant told city and county leaders Wednesday. Representatives of the
Boston-based Technical Assistance Collaborative, in their preliminary recommendations,
advised adding 50 to 75 low-barrier shelter beds in concert with additions and changes to social
services to help get hundreds of people off the street. Those steps included increasing outreach to
the homeless population to connect them to social services and adding more than 300 supportive
housing beds that provide homeless individuals with a place to sleep as well as drug and alcohol
treatment, job training and other support services” (Hill). Only building a homeless shelter will
not cure the issue of homelessness, but it is a start. There are bigger issues within the homeless
community like drug use and alcoholism and by building a shelter, we can include services that
help newly sheltered people get off of drugs and alcohol, and prepare them for things like getting
a job, paying bills and buying groceries. If we were to start with building shelters for the
homeless, we could progressively lower the homelessness rate in San Diego which currently
stands at 4,476 unsheltered people in 2019 (Ong). Once we get them into shelters, we can help
them come off of drugs and help prepare them for the real world and recover from living on the
In summary, San Diego is the fourth-largest homeless population in the country, and we,
as a city, have always had an issue with homelessness. It is time for us to make a change and do
better for our citizens. Instead of President Trump building a wall, we should be building
housing for citizens of this nation rather than focusing on keeping out citizens of a different one.
Works Cited
Gregory Bull/AP. “Deadly Hepatitis A Outbreak among San Diego Homeless Holds
Lessons for Canada.” The Globe and Mail, 30 Dec. 2017,
Hill, Christian, and Christian Hill. “Public Shelter Alone Won’t Fix Homelessness Crisis,
Consultant Says.” Guard, The Register-Guard, 11 Oct. 2018,
“More Than 3,000 Housing Opportunities Created in 18 Months Through SDHC’s
Homelessness Action Plan.” SDHC,
Ong, Jermaine. “New Report Shows Nearly 8,000 Homeless in San Diego County.”
KGTV, 29 Apr. 2019,
“Proven Solutions.” Coalition For The Homeless,
“Trump’s Border Wall — How Much It Will Actually Cost According to a Statistician.”
Fox News, FOX News Network,
Walsh, Lynn, et al. “How Much Money Is Spent On Homeless Services In San Diego?”
NBC 7 San Diego, NBC 7 San Diego, 1 Apr. 2019,
Warth, Gary. “San Diego Again Has 4th-Largest Homeless Population in Nation.”
Tribune, San Diego Union-Tribune, 18 Dec. 2018,
“What Are the Real Dangers of Airborne Fecal Matter?” Enviro, 9 June 2017,
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